I Am Mito
by 0WannabeWriter0
Summary: Mito overhears Gon and Killua’s conversation of their futures and she could not bring herself to intrude, even if only bringing a basket of snacks for them. So she thinks back.


Disclaimer: I, 0WannabeWriter0, do not own Yoshihiro Togashi's Hunter X Hunter, his characters, nor his storylines.

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Somehow, listening to Gon and Killua made me silent, made me wait, made me stop. No, I was not spying, but I just overheard. This basket of snacks and blankets I'm carrying was originally for them because I knew they were camping outside. But hearing them talk… it made me think back… back to my childhood… and my close ones.

I wasn't a talkative girl back then. I wasn't particularly well-liked. I wasn't hated exactly because no one was really hated on Whale Island. Of course Ging was loved or at least well-received by the general public because he was exceptional… but I was merely one of the children on the island.

I had a sister back then.

She was my rival. She was so much of what I could've become if she wasn't there. She… actually, I was better than her in so many things. So many things I could do and she couldn't… she didn't do them. But even so, at some points in my life, I could have hated her. She was… normal like me, but with something different. I just can't put a finger on it.

I had once put my eyes on someone who faced the horizon.

That boy… was very kind, but very cruel at the same time… two juxtaposing images of one person.

He was someone who always had his eyes set far away on the horizon… to something brighter and more promising for this world.

He was certainly someone who was meant to do things, greater things than our little Whale Island would allow him.

All I wanted…

He was certainly meant to be admired by anyone who met him. That… I must say.

He was always the one who found me when I got lost in the forest… even when I hid myself on purpose. He was… I guess he was the brother I never had.

One day, he left. He left for the Hunter Exam. And that was the last we heard of him. He did come back though, but that was ten years later. He came back… in good shape. We were all surprised and shocked to see him. He changed so much, but when he smiled and when he looked out of the window, I knew he was still the same Ging who left Whale Island ten years ago. He would never change. I knew it. And I was happy for him for it.

He married my sister soon after. And they had a baby boy, Gon, they named their son. But after that, he never stayed long. He was often away for his work, he said. My sister looked so sad and worried when he was away. She was different from how she used to be. She didn't live long.

At that time, Ging already took his son away on one of his travels. And we were too busy taking care of my sister to discuss anything with him. Then my sister quietly, secretly passed away. The house was so loud that I thought it would grab her soul back, but she was more fleeting than a deer. I walked outside of the house to see a bright sunny day. The wind rippled through the newly washed laundry hanging on the clothesline. And I wanted to run.

_You never gave me a chance. Stupid boy!_

I ran into the forest… into the deepest part of the forest where only Ging and I knew. I felt nature all around me… so natural and peaceful and quiet. The creatures were silent, hidden in the shadows and I rumbled through the land all the time hating my sister and Ging, hating my sister and Ging. I finally found a hiding place. Strange, I thought we had both scoured the whole island through and through. No stone was left unturned when I followed him out of doors to explore. But I still found a new place. I bent down, looked hard into it, and imagined myself years and years younger. I burrowed myself into the hiding place. It became my sanctuary for the time being. But I had to go back sometime. If I didn't go back of my own accord, he would find me, as always. But he wouldn't this time. He's not back from his travels. And I lived in no fairytale. I have to go back myself.

Hours into nightfall, I slowly, silently clambered out of my sanctuary. I walked back, each footstep echoing the sound of seconds ticking away into the past, bringing the unpromising future towards me. I reached my front door and creaked it open. It was left unlocked for me to return. For some reason, knowing that Mother was alive waiting for me made my stomach turn over and my face knit up. I lowered my head because I couldn't bear to look at anything in my house. I wrenched my feet from the ground and made my way upstairs. I passed over my sister's bedroom.

The last day of mourning was her funeral. It was the day we lowered the casket into the ground. As I stood by her sleeping body, I felt so sorry for her, for anyone present…. for anyone who knew our family. I looked at my sister's closed eyes and gray face and looked to the blue sky with clouds roiling about. And out of the corner of my eye, for a glimpse, I saw that cursed man. That Ging who I now hated so much. I wanted him to be in the casket in place of my sister. If God wouldn't grant my wish, at least that boy who never grew up could be in the casket with her. But another moment and he was gone. I opened my eyes clearly to assure that.

That night, he came to our door. I sat at the kitchen table, half expecting him to come in, my heart beating wildly with hatred and anger. Mother passed by me to open the door. I felt the wind as she walked by. I heard her greet him, but her words were short and heavy like stones. I couldn't stand it anymore and I rushed outside. As always, Ging's presence always unnerved me. I froze for a moment and he spoke up. He asked us to take care of Gon for the time being because he couldn't bring his son on this job. Before he could explain anymore, I started yelling so loud the whole island could have heard me. But I was beyond caring. What only mattered was that he heard the words I had to say. I said the same things over and over again to him. And he deserved every single thing that I pierced into him. I knew it. He knew it.

He wouldn't say another word. And I knew he would probably never say another word to me in my life.

Then I took away his custody of Gon. He left. That was the last I saw of him.

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Yes, Mother?

"What are you doing right now?  
If you really wanted to burn Ging's box, you would've done this years ago."

I threw it away, but someone always put it back on the shelf.

"Hm. That's your fault for throwing it away in such an obvious place.  
Ging would've wanted Gon to have that box."

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**Gon**  
"I will wait until Mito san is ready to give me the things Ging left behind."


End file.
